grateful for what didn't have to be

When discussing being thankful sometimes my children have a difficult time coming up with a list.

As a catalyst I tell them to try and think of the people and things that they'd be sad about if they weren't in their lives. 

For some reason this Mother's Day weekend I began thinking on what might not have been, and I found myself so grateful that I'm currently living the life I am because it didn't have to be so.

When my firstborn was eight months old we rushed her to the hospital for treatment, and from there an ambulance rushed her to another hospital for additional care. I literally was resigned to the fact that this could be the end of my time with her, and was talking to God through the event trying to keep my focus. Although we've had more urgent care runs in her short span of life her health needs are manageable, not dire. There's so much care available for asthma, but you have to be vigilant about it or it is life threatening.

When  my second baby was in the womb, there were potential complications with his health (because of  my health) and it was simply a waiting game. I was tested each month of the pregnancy, but at any point during those months a situation could occur that put the baby's life at risk. Again I was resigned to the fact that the hope of this baby's time with us might be put to an end before it began outside the womb. The result was that my boy was born just 11 days before his due date. We spent too many hours in the NICU, he had too many needle pricks, he was too yellow from his jaundice, but eventually it all evened out and he was/is healthy.

I kept thinking on what might not have been this weekend and it just made me soak up the gratefulness even more. Due to my health issues during the second pregnancy we knew that two babies were God's best for us, no more. This was our chance. So many tiny details are in our control, yet things such as this are lifted up to the One who creates life. For us there is no other resolve than to trust God's best, and He has given us the amazingly best of children; as different as night and day, so beautiful, delightful, enjoyable. Gifts. 

mother's day crafty goodness

In talking to friends this weekend I found out that their young child has an ongoing health issue that has real potential to be life threatening. It is a waiting game of trusting God and frequent testing. These friends are dear to us, their child is beautiful. We wait and trust with them. One of the amazing gifts of believing in God is being able to talk to him on behalf of yourself and others ~ being able to thank Him for what is, what could not have been, trusting for the future.


Thanks for sharing that Rachel. Being a mother breaks us to the core, for our own families and others. We are praying and for a little boy who is dying of cancer right now. Being covered by grace going through my own loss, I'm still amazed that he will cover them too.